We hear it all the time — ‘Opposites Attract’ — but does this truthfully apply when it comes to love? Can two people who are completely different last a lifetime with each other?

Consider the quiet straight-A girl who sits at the front of the class attracted to the party boy who misses every class — at first the girl might be drawn to him because he sparks a tremendous interest to her. She senses adventure and mysteriousness in him. Soon she goes out of her element and gets caught up in his whirlwind of charm. However, the attraction eventually fades and she starts gravitating back into her true self, to that place of self-fulfilment — away from him.

In most instances, opposites attract but the attraction never lasts; kind of like watching an infomercial — at first you’re in awe at the product, then all of a sudden you need it in your life. You buy it but after some time passes, it’s tossed in a box in your garage and you’re back to comfortably living without it.

“Opposites attract and then can’t stand each other.” — Kenneth Kaye

An extrovert and an introvert cannot coexist for long periods, much less be together in a long-term relationship — at least not a healthy one anyway. Many carry the misconception that couples who are too similar are less likely to last. Even some researchers say that couples who are too similar, both physically and in personality, are less likely to have a long lasting relationship. I completely disagree. I lived the life of an extrovert/introvert relationship for twelve years — it never lasts. Can you sit at home on a Friday night and enjoy reading a book while your significant other is partying at the club? Maybe for just a couple times; but for a lifetime? — I’m sure that answer is ‘no’.

Scientists discovered that the theory ‘opposites attract’ is a myth and that people do not form real friendships or relationships with people who do not hold the same values and views as themselves. As I grew older, my experiences made me understand this — people who share similar interests and beliefs tend to naturally want to spend more time together. I believe it is healthy to have some differences — after all, you don’t want to be dating a replica of yourself; but a relationship should be formed on the basis of a genuine friendship which requires two people to have similarities in beliefs and values. Any long-lasting relationship requires such friendship and a shared lifestyle. This not only makes it easy for a couple to peacefully coexist and get each other, but it’s fulfilling to have someone who is relatable and enjoys the same things as you — it just makes life easier!

Maybe opposites do attract, but I believe it never lasts. What do you think?

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Thank you for reading 🙂
Keep Smiling — Love, Candace

30 thoughts on “Do Opposites Truly Attract When it Comes to Love?”

  1. We believe as you. Its about friendship. We began as friends and this friendship keeps growing without end in site. The world works hard at trying to tell us what beauty is and they don’t have a clue. Great post.

  2. Hey Candace! I totally agree with the never lasting part of your post. I also believe that for two people to last together they should have atleast a common set of things that they mutually share a interest in. Its a very interesting and nice post! 😄

  3. This is very true. Being attracted to someone does not mean that you can have a long term fulfilling relationship, although the attraction is needed. Another great post my love.

  4. Me and my boyfriend are definitely true opposites ! And I have to say that we can always work things out 🙂 ! ” Opposites attract ” doesn’t work for everyone 🙂 !

  5. My husband and I are different in some ways, but we are also similar in many ways too. I’m not sure if we are opposites though. We have been together for 17 years!

    1. Hey Elizabeth.. there would always be differences, which I think is healthy too. As similar as my boyfriend and I are, we are different in some ways but our many similarities brought us much closer. I’m sure the similarities contributed to those 17 years 😀

  6. Well… I will say opposite do attract and it can last if you learn to meet half way when needs be and totally trust each other . I am quite quiet with a very quiet confidence, an introvert and extremely private but my other half is loud and happy to yap away with total strangers and cracks jokes in public.totally my opposite but we have been happily married for 15 years. I have learnt to losen up a little bit when I need to and he knows when to tone it down a bit 😂I am hoping we will be together for many more years xx

  7. I think both are true. There are so many factors that contribute to the success of a relationship. Where each person is at in their lives is a biggie. I loved everything about your perspective… definitely a thought provoking conversation!
    Thank you so so much ❤

  8. I’m not quite sure where I stand on this. I seen opposites succeed and two people meant to be together fail….I think that it depends on the individuals and the level of compromise.

  9. Hello,
    Pleasure to meet you and thank you for taking time to visit my blog page and having a follow. I love the theme of your blog page, is very elegant and easy to read. This was also a good take on the topic of opposites attracting.
    Shay-lon

  10. I agree with you. Yes, opposites can “attract”, but if you are truly opposite then that initial attraction will not last. That being said, you don’t need to be completely alike, in order to last. Heck, that would probably get boring. I think it is good for people to have different interests and hobbies which they can continue to enjoy separately from their Significant Other. And sometimes that other person can introduce you to new things which you may find yourself enjoying.

  11. There’s a fine line between love and hate. I think we confuse that. It’s normal to want something you don’t have, or be impressed by a quality you don’t possess. But In the end relationship requires more than just attraction. Compromise and understanding, that might not be easy for opposites.

  12. I found that to be true in my case as well. I tried to make it work for 20 years. But came to the realization I had been giving pieces of myself away in the name of household “peace”. We were compatible as friends but we shouldn’t have been spouses. It wasn’t awful but it wasn’t wonderful either. We parted amicably and we remain friends today. But it’s nothing compared to the real love I have now with someone who was cut from the same cloth as I. We are two peas in a pod.

    1. Wow… 20 years!!! I guess some people “make it work”.. but as you said, it does take a lot of extra effort and compromise on both ends to do so. After years, it becomes exhausting and can take a toll on both individuals and the relationship. I experienced both — being with an opposite and being with someone who is quite similar. I gotta say, the latter it’s extremely refreshing and wayyyy easier. I’m happy you found that 🙂

  13. Ecstatic to say this is not the case with me and my misses. While we share common values we could not be more unalike. We just celebrated our thirty-first anniversary so I think we’re probably safe. 😉

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